Looking back at my work I notice I'm still making the same exact mistakes that I have since the beginning. I'm still having trouble drawing things that are in front of me and I still can't get proportions right. I can't help wonder why practice isn't helping me develop. Everyone else tells me it should but, no matter how much I try I still can't get any closer to drawing things the way I intend to. The strange thing is most people assume I want to draw this way and I can't understand why. Every single one of my horrible failures looks objectively awful. I have never liked any of my own work and it is the reason why I have no self respect or self worth.
It doesn't seem to matter how many websites I go to or how many youtube videos ( fav.me/d6xjcmu
) I see, or even how many books ( fav.me/d4sro5b
) I read I can't seem to do any better. I just wish i could somehow get into an art school. That seems like the only way to learn how to draw.